She’s 24; Why Does that Make Me Feel Old! My baby girl turned 24 this week! A spicy “little” girl, that came into the world screaming…constantly! Born with light red hair, tiny and seemed so fragile. Only weighing just above 6 lbs and the first to set her mama on edge, she screamed for a week solid. I cried, she cried, she was hungry, I was tired, and I was a nervous wreck. She was my second child, not really my first rodeo, and I knew there something wrong. My baby was having troubling sucking; I cut the nipples and dripped the formula in her mouth. It was then she was lying on her back screaming and I noticed her mouth…she was so tiny it was hard to see. I grabbed a flashlight and forced her mouth open again. I had never seen anything like it. A ridge down the center separated the roof of her mouth, two small narrow cavities down either side. I called the doctor’s office, they didn't have an opening, and I didn't care. I called my mother and we headed to the clinic. A cleft palate undetected, I was literally starving my baby. The ridge was her nose, and the cavities her nasal passages. Weighing only just above 5 lbs at this point, I felt defeated, crying more & the nurses cried with me. I was exhausted but relieved for an answer. She was missing the hard and soft palates. The next few days were a blur; Feeding specialists, doctor appointments, clinics, accusations from my spouse, but finally a happier baby and some rest. The next several years were full of doctor appointments, surgeries, hospital stays, and a little girl that wore cowboy boots with her dresses, snuck away to see the horses on the edge of town, crossed her arms, stomped her feet, and kicked a doctor or two. She’s neither my youngest nor my only girl but her father and I still call her “baby girl”, odd since we were divorced by the time she turned 2. She’s feisty and a fighter! She’s her mother’s daughter times 10. She’s opinionated and driven, a hard worker, and full of grand ideas. She’s 24, I don’t know why that makes me feel old, and her older brother is 28 and going to be a daddy. That should age me but it didn't even phase me, I’m not sure why her birthday did. Today she’s become one of my best friends, a transition not all mothers’ make with their kids. I talk to her several times a week via phone, text, FB, etc. and in December of this year she’ll graduate with her second degree. I’m proud of my feisty baby girl.
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Never Stop, Keep Moving Forward
“Never Stop, Keep Moving Forward”. When I gave that speech to my older kids, you could see the determination in their face. “You can do it”, I said it over and over, and I meant every word. When I gave that speech to my special girl today, I was also assuring myself that we would succeed together in this journey. I’m not sure she completely understands, or maybe she understands more than I think she does. She never fails to surprise me. This kid has taught me much in her short 18+ years; patience, unconditional love, and to celebrate the little things. She wants so much to be like her peers and frankly so does her mama. You may think I’m cruel for saying such a thing but the reality of it is, you never know how strong you are or you have to be until you face a challenge. It’s true all the articles you read about mourning the child you expected you would have. I have to learn to let go of that and know that I am a very fortunate mommy. I’ve spent 18 almost 19 years teaching her right from wrong, how to dress, how to cook, clean, answer a phone, etc. All things that you take for granted when you have a “normal” child. I’ve never treated her different from her siblings and I believe she’s a better person for it. She tried her hand at college? Why? You may ask. Because she wanted to and I’ve never told my kids they were incapable of doing anything. I’ve always reassured them, from the oldest to the youngest, “if you want it bad enough, you can do!” Have they failed? You bet! “Now pick yourself up, never stop, and keep moving forward!” I believe in my kids, I believe in her, and she will succeed at whatever she chooses to do. We received her final grade today from her college class. Was it an A? No…BUT she didn’t fail! She didn’t get a an F. She passed! Maybe not in your eyes but in this mama’s eyes she reached for the stars and she succeeded! I cried, I cried a lot, but I assure you they were happy tears. She’s taught me to celebrate the little things. We will never stop, we will keep moving forward, and we will succeed. |
Cynthia"Don't put an age limit Archives
July 2018
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